I will be as humorous as I can here, but dating a person for 2 months has completely turned me against ever being in a relationship again. EVER. I will be 43 years old next week, and I want nothing more than to be left alone with no one touching me or asking me for anything.

And now I will clarify that, because I am not the Ice Queen; unemotional, and lacking in feelings.

So, here we go…

60 days ago: I ask out someone I know, kind of, and worked with, kind of, and knew he was on a list for a heart transplant.

59 days ago: I am on my way home from work, I ordered pizza and I will pick you up on my way home.

59 days ago, later: I pick you up. We have never had a serious conversation, but you come out the door with flowers and lean towards me to kiss me….WTF? Your whole family is right there watching, is there some kind of conversation going on behind the scene that I am never privy to?

56 days ago: I am getting random messages at all weird hours of the night. And wake up to FB posts where you high-jacked my blog pictures and are declaring your love to me for all of our 800 friends to see.

56 days ago: I tell you to knock it to hell off. I need space. I like to crawl into bed and stay there for days at a time. I love my cat. I LOVE MY CAT. This is the only man who will ever own my heart again. (Okay, and how flipping awesome is he, anyhow?)

53 days ago: All is quiet, for a bit. But I am making excuses to not see this guy, but how can I be the person to dump the guy with the defective heart waiting for a transplant? Everyone loves him.

52 days ago: He tells me the last girl he dated told him he deserves to dies alone. I was mad at the time. Now I understand.

50 days ago: He wants to go to church with me, because church is my #1. Yet he has never been to church. He has no idea if I am Catholic, Christian, Mormon, or anything else….

And there is more to come tomorrow. Stay tuned, I will let you know how to get rid of a stalker asap!