bullying

All posts tagged bullying

Thank Goodness for Public Schools!

Published September 10, 2015 by Angela

Yes; I am over-the-moon that my introverted 14 year old, whom I home-schooled for 7th & 8th grades because she refused to go to school; is an active, happy Freshman at our local high school.

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Am I knocking home-schooling? Never. We had fun, and we learned together. But as a single Mom who works 50 hours a week, it was more than difficult.

To have her come home and be excited as she tells me what happened during her day, and to see her waiting outside for me to pick her up, surrounded by friends; tears and happiness.

I am so proud of her for doing this, because I know as much as she tells me about the exciting things; she is stressed about the halls full of kids she doesn’t know, the teachers asking her questions, and trying to find her way around a 3-story school.

She is the one being sat on :-)

She is the one being sat on 🙂

She is determined to belong, while being herself. And that makes me more happy that anything else ever could.

When There Is Nowhere To Turn…

Published October 10, 2014 by Angela

…there is always one place I can, and do, still turn. That is to my faith, my God, and my Savior. Sometimes that is the only place I can turn, and I am okay with that. That is where I get my strength, courage, and peace of mind. Some days that is the only place I can turn, and even on the days when I do not feel a pressing need to turn to my faith, I still do; to say Thank You. Thank you for my children, my health, my job, a warm home, and the means to support my girls and myself on my own.

So after great accomplishments and gains, I again saw this on my 13 year olds arm today:

Why this again? :-(

Why this again? 😦

She says it has been a year, and I believe her, but why now? She said it was because she couldn’t yell at anyone?

What?
Wait. WHAT?
Does she not think I would rather her yell at someone, myself included, then intentionally hurt herself? We go through this, and get her help, and she takes her medication, but still turns back to this to make herself feel better.

It hurts me that she will hurt herself, and I am so helpless to help her. I have tried everything, times 3, and well beyond.

This is what turns me to my faith. I wish she would start turning to her faith as well.

This Is Probably Wrong On So Many Levels….

Published December 20, 2013 by Angela

But I have literally been off from work for 8 hours, and am thinking I need to find a part-time job for 9 days.

I have never, never, in 21+ years of parenting, had to listen to girls fight as much as I have for the last 2 weeks. Unbelievable. The closer it gets to Christmas; the worse they fight. Yet they ask me: “Mom, can you put some more presents under the tree?”

Really?

I am about to return the ones that are already under the tree.

And go shopping for myself.

Honestly, it has been snowing here since Halloween, and I think this is going to be a long season of cabin fever. I have the best of intentions, and the smallest of patience. And the less patience I have, the more they fight. I don’t want to be home having my sleep schedule messed up. I want to go to work at 10 pm, and crawl into bed at 8 am with my earplugs, and eye mask, and “The Hobbit” blaring loud enough in the DVD to drown out my kids arguing.

I am soooo sick of hearing “stupid”, and “idiot” in my house that I can’t even discuss it. When did I become the Mother and Father to such rude children? They weren’t this rude last year, or last month. But I have become the parent of not only children who suffer from being bullied, but they are also the bullies; to their own sisters.

We will be spending every moment that our church is having service at church, and the rest of the time doing things for others who are less fortunate. Because my girls think they have it pretty bad; I think it’s time for them to see what pretty bad really is. It isn’t having to use the same back-pack two years in a row; it is not having a pair of shoes that lets you go to school in the first place.

 

When Did We Become So Mean?

Published December 8, 2013 by Angela

Since I have been up for hours (it is currently 5:45am) as is normal for me on weekends that I don’t work, I figured I would watch “The Sound of Music” which was shown live Thursday on NBC. Did I want to watch it? Not particularly. But the aftermath that went on from this live version really had me wondering “How bad could it really be?” So I had to see for myself.

I am not an actress; I have never been, or wanted to be. I have never been in a school play, a production of any kind, and the most I got in front of a crowd was for band concerts, one invisible kid in a crowd of kids. So I am not going to make any comments of what I feel the quality of the acting that happened during this LIVE performance was. And I will not write the names here of the previous actresses whom acted in the original movie version with Julie Andrews, as the various children in the movie. They do not deserve mention, and should wholly be ashamed of themselves.

What I would like to know, is exactly how many takes each one of their scenes took, because every single time they made a mistake, someone said “Cut!” and they got to go back and fix it. Time after time. After time. How would they have done live? Probably not so hot. But they would not have gotten bullied while they were continuing to act live on a stage knowing the whole world was waiting for them to fail. Hoping for them to fail.

“How dare you try to play a role Julie Andrews played!” “Almost painful to watch!” Really? Painful? What is painful is reading comments from a couple has-beens who are sitting behind an electronic device giving criticism on a role they never had to perform. I agree with Carrie Underwood that these critics need Jesus. Boy do they ever. They need a lot more than that. Would putting them on the other side of the fence make them understand? Not likely. Most bullies do not ever believe they have done anything wrong. Not all, but a lot.

Am I a fan of Carrie Underwood’s? No, I am not. I think she has an amazing voice (I can’t carry a tune in a bucket!) but I do not like country music. I am familiar with some of her songs; they are catchy and good, but I haven’t heard a song yet that has me going to the store to buy her CD. But that doesn’t mean I wish her to fail.

As a parent of a child who suffered through 3 years of terrible bullying before finally telling me the whole truth of what was happening to her, to what I went through for 3 years fighting with a young girl every single day to go to school; being threatened with court, jail, and fines; to having a homeschooler who is calm, content, and successful, I have to say, this display of public bullying really, REALLY pisses me off. (I just had to erase what I typed after that because it was not what Jesus would say, and I will not allow someone to turn ME into a bully too!)

I understand we live in a world of instant information, and I still can’t say that I think this is a great thing. When I was growing up, I could go home, not answer the phone, did not have a computer or cell phone going off non-stop, and could have peace and quiet. Now our children can be harassed 24 hours a day, and it is a very difficult thing to stop.

We can all be better people, and make better examples for others. We can each make a positive difference, if we choose to. Or we can be part of the problem.

Be a friend, not the enemy.

I want to be part of the solution. Who’s with me?

I Have Found it to be Impossible…..

Published September 11, 2013 by Angela

to homeschool without the assistance of the internet. I bring this up because I removed the family computer from my home about a month ago due to bullying on social sites as well as inappropriate activity. All of the books for the 7th grade curriculum have great lessons, hints, and games online to assist in the learning. I sat down with my student the other night on my laptop and went through 6 math quizzes which she did excellent on. The writing and grammer that she sometimes struggles with also has online assistance. So I believe Best Buy will again be getting a large chunk of my money this weekend. I have looked at the Microsoft Family Safety software that is free and it seems like between that and the parental controls, I can pretty much lock each child’s page to only the pages I will allow them to go to. Has anyone had any experience with Microsoft’s Family Safety software and what do you think of it? Any other suggestions? I do like that it will send me a report of all activity, and I also have one more download of Norton Security I can download onto a computer.

I am very nervous about having issues start up again, and if anyone has found a successful way to homeschool completely internet free I would love to hear about that too!