The first official full day of Summer vacation for my girls. So I am putting in the ear plugs, putting on the eye mask, taking some ZzzzQuil ( 🙂 ) grabbing my naked kitty, and going to bed for the day. Keeping my fingers crossed for a house that looks at 2pm the way it looks now at 4am (or even better, which would be So awesome!).
I figured it was time to check back in with my 2014 to-do list, and see where I am at. My original list can be seen here: https://parenthoodandotherhorrorstories.com/2014/01/02/my-2014-to-do-list/
1) Go to church a lot more – I am pretty successful with this one. I don’t miss too often, because I can really tell when I do; my attitude pretty much tanks.
2) Tithe a lot more- Success
3) Stop swearing – doing pretty well. I still swear, but nowhere near as much as I did. I wonder if it counts if I am still thinking the words, and just not saying them?
4) Stop yelling – Better, but I still have my moments
5) Make and take some “me” time – This made me want to cry when I read this. Literally, I felt the tears behind my eyes. This has not happened, and with my kids going non-stop, and me working and going to college, it feels like it is not going to happen anytime soon. I get a 6-week break from college at the end of June, and the girls will be out of school so hopefully I can make this happen!
6) Patience – yeah. Next…
7) Exercise – LOL. Still. Next…
8) Read the Bible – I am up to 1 Samuel. I have gotten through Genesis, Exodus, Leviticus, Numbers, Deuteronomy, Joshua, Judges, and Ruth.
9) Improve my photography skills – I have not had the camera out very much, at all. I am trying to focus on taking it with me when I go somewhere so I have it handy all the time.
10) Allow myself to be happy – I have been feeling kind of crummy for the last couple of months. As the weather gets nicer, my mood gets more crummy. I think it is just all of the running I have been doing, along with school work. I have been Blessed with so much, and have been focusing on Thanking God for that on a daily basis 🙂
I saw an interesting post yesterday, about how if you do not have enough time to do whatever it is you are doing, you are likely doing the wrong thing, or at least doing it in the wrong way. I have been feeling this for the past couple of weeks. Church activities have wound down now that Easter is over, but I have been busier than ever. My 16 year old is just about done with drivers training, thank goodness, because this is 4 days a week that I have to get up earlier than normal. So I am more tired than normal. I have worked two 12 hour days in a row due to a supervisor being on vacation, so I feel like nothing at home is getting done. And, I have a class winding down, so I am working on a graduate research paper, instead of procrastinating like I normally do and waiting until the last minute.
So could I be doing things differently to have more time? Probably not this week, or the next. But I do have a tendency to get myself involved in more things than my schedule allows, and I need to learn how to say no.
Case in point? I got a phone call yesterday to remind me to have my 9 year old at church at 5:30pm today to practice singing for the Mother’s Day church service. So I got up early, got ready for the day, dropped off 16 year old at drivers training, and went home. I went back and got daughter at 7pm, walked in the door, and realized I completely forgot about the practice tonight. I feel terrible because I know they were counting on her being there. I haven’t even called yet to explain my forgetfulness because I really don’t know what to say.
I need to prioritize, write things on my calendar, and take some time every day to relax, for my well-being and sanity!
How do you tend to overwhelm yourself, and what do you do to correct it?
…they are mine, they are the best, and I couldn’t imagine my life without any of them 🙂
And Yes; I do enjoy griping about them. Hey, they make it way too easy to just let it go!
Enough said!
I am not even sure if I want to know how a 16 year old girl can lose two (count ‘em; 2) pairs of pants.
“Did you check in that overflowing laundry basket that has been sitting on your bedroom floor for the past month?” Yes, she did.
“Did you check in the two laundry baskets sitting at the top of the stairs that are both full of your girls’ clean laundry I ran for you this weekend?” Yes, she did.
“Did you check in your sister’s closet, to make sure I didn’t hang them up thinking they were Erin’s pants?” Yes, she did.
“Did you look under your bed?” Yes, she did.
“Did you look under your sister’s bed?” Yes, she did.
“Did you check your sister’s dressers?” Yes, she did.
“No, I did not put your 2 pairs of jeans in my closet. I cannot wear your clothes, so why would I take your pants when we do not wash our clothes together?” She doesn’t know.
Now there are certain things that go on in my house without fail, and I will never deviate from this. I absolutely, without a doubt, will not run my laundry with any of my girls’ laundry. Yes, 1-2 times a week, I run my laundry, all by itself. Not only does it save my clothes from being destroyed by the lip-gloss/markers/crayons/candy/gum that seem to get left in their pockets and laundered on a weekly basis, but it also saves me from having to dig my clothes out of their clothes when the laundry is done. My clothes get washed, dried, and taken care of immediately. They seem to be okay living out of laundry baskets, and unless if I feel motivated to put some of their things on hangers, they keep living out of those laundry baskets.
Now before you get on me about wasting water; I am not running a pair of jeans and a shirt through the washer and dryer. I am running full loads of clothes; and honestly, my girls could do a full load of clothes every, single day of the week and never get caught up on their laundry.
So what I would really like to ask her is:
“Did you leave your pants at school?” “Did you leave them at a friend’s house?” “Did you leave them at your now-ex-boyfriend’s house?” “Did you leave your pants on the bus?” “Did you give these pants to someone?” “Did you somehow wreck these pants and you don’t want to tell me?” “Did you cut these pants up like you do so many other clothes because you were trying to make something else to wear?” “Why do I have to rush to the store to buy you more pants when I’m not the one who lost them?” “Why is it my responsibility to know where you last took your pants off at!?!”
So, the mystery of the missing pants continues. I have literally been having her ask me those same questions on a daily basis for the last several days. If these pants ever turn up again, I will let you know where they were hiding!
5:45 am-
15 y.o.: Mom, where’s my “To Kill A Mockingbird Book?”
Me: In your bag
15 y.o.: No, it isn’t
Me: Well the last time I saw it, it was halfway under the sofa because it fell out of your book bag that you dropped in the middle of the living room floor for everyone to trip over.
15 y.o.: I can’t find it
Me: Well, I would move the sofa out. Your sister hung up your book bag for me and I told her to put your book in it.
No Luck…. I didn’t tell her I have a copy of it in the bookshelf in the basement.
I can’t get mad at her messiness, because I know I was the exact same way. But it seems like every day I am playing Sherlock Holmes, looking for school books, homework, socks, and toys.
Toys. Toys I don’t even remember them having and certainly didn’t play with 🙂 Toys they try to describe to me and I do not understand. I know for a fact 2 of the three have brand new school clothes floating around this house somewhere, still with the tags on and never worn! Because I ask them where it is and they don’t know.
What I should do is find the stuff myself and wrap it up as Christmas gifts 🙂
When did I become so old? LOL
I completely understand why my Dad went through my bedroom every month while I was growing up, with a garbage bag, and threw out everything on the floor. The only difference between he and I though, is that he would never replace something he threw away because of my messiness. (Yes, I have thrown stuff out, only to buy it again, and I am fully ashamed to say that!)
Nothing in the world is truer than this!
As I complain (sarcastically) I am very lucky to have 3 awesome girls still at home (4 awesome girls, one being a Junior in college). They do very well when asked to do something for me, but I swear to goodness I will never, ever know how after a pair of socks are worn once, its mate is never-to-be-seen again!
Do you have any special tricks to get your kids to be organized?
OK, I can’t even believe I am going to fess up to this, but I will. I told myself that when I started my blog (2 actually) that I would be straight-forward, honest, and not hold back.
So, as I continue to work through this homeschooling with my 12 year old, and after several hours of going over homework last night, the following is what I thought to myself:
“Well, maybe I can teach her how to cook and she will meet a nice Doctor and make an excellent housewife.”
Yes, I thought that to myself. Yes, I felt bad after I thought it. I know I was thinking it to myself half in jest, but just half.
Now, before anyone decides to get all righteous on me and tell me how many steps down the ladder I just threw women all over the world, let me explain what goes on in MY house.
Single parent, 4 daughters aged 21 down to 9 years old. The majority of their lives have been spent with me raising them alone, with the exception of my oldest who has an active, loving relationship with her father. Heck, I still go to his family’s birthday and holiday parties, summer cook-outs, and drop in for a visit when I’m nearby J Now, I certainly did not ever start out planning on raising 4 daughters alone. But stuff happens, mistakes get made, and lives change.
As a single parent, I do NOT get child support for my 3 youngest children whom are still at home. I do not get ANY assistance from my city or state in the way of paying for my home, food, or utilities. I am very blessed to have an amazing job with one of the largest companies in the world for over 17 years. I love my job; I love to work. I would have settled for a househusband as well, but that never panned out either 🙂
I have worked my way through college getting 2 degrees while working full time and raising my girls. However, it was never my intention to be a teacher. If I wanted to be a teacher, I would have went to college to be a teacher.
Now, with that being said, I also knew from 3 previous years’ experience that my 12 year old was not going to get up on a daily basis and go to school.
You’re saying– “Just make her go, you’re the adult!!”
Mmm-hmmm.
It doesn’t work that way. I have threatened, punished, physically put her in my car and drove her to school (she got out of the car and ran home). Called the school principal, teachers, counselors, superintendent of school, asking for ideas and help. I’ve called the police and had a state police officer stand in my house for 45 minutes and he could not get her to go to school (He told me she needs her behind whipped). She is on medication, she goes to therapy, I cry and get stressed out because I do not know what to do with her.
So I homeschool. I don’t get threatened with fines and jail time anymore, and she is learning.
It works for her, so I am making it work for me. I would do anything for any one of my girls, which I have shown time and again, usually without them even knowing it. But I am also smart enough to realize school and college are just not motivating to everyone in the world. She has a purpose and destiny in life, and it is my job and responsibility to help her find out what that is so she can nurture that and grow in it. Who knows, maybe she is meant to be a stay-at-home Mom and take care of her husband, raise children, and homeschool. Or maybe she is the next CEO of a major corporation who just hasn’t found her motivation yet.
What I do know is that she is important. She matters, she has a purpose, and she will make a difference. In her own, special, unique way. And I also know that I will be proud of her no matter what path she decides to take in life.
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