raising teenagers

All posts tagged raising teenagers

As The School Year Begins…

Published September 6, 2018 by Angela

…I have been working through the things I need to do for myself, and my girls, to make this new start of the year go smoothly, and in the best possible fashion for my new Freshman. I have always viewed the beginning of the school year as a start of a “new year” for myself as well. It is a time to get new schedules put in place, new goals to work on, and I get to enjoy the most beautiful time of the year, Autumn in Michigan, and High School Football. My girls going to the school with the most winning football team in Michigan history makes the football games unbelievably exciting! Always having one of my girls in the Marching Band is a wonderful bonus as well!

My 17 year old is now also back with me for the majority of the time, which I am over the Moon about, but it definitely throws another dynamic in the picture. She is out of school, so I need to make sure she stays on a schedule herself, which can certainly be a struggle with her 😊 We are working on what is next for her, and what opportunities are available, and what she may need to work on to achieve her goals.

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Now I get to figure out how to get and keep myself on track. I honestly feel like for the last month or so I have been completely off the rails. Not in a destructive way, per se, but I certainly am not eating as healthy as I had been for the previous couple of months, and I feel like I have too many pans in the fire, and I need to get something in place to manage everything. It is certainly possible with good organization and determination on my part. When I have those days though, where I don’t want to get out of bed, I have no motivation, or my anxiety has come to roost, it is hard to get anything done, or even think about anything.

I can wake up feeling fantastic and motivated to conquer the world, but it quickly disappears. Once I start working on a project, even if it is cleaning the house or doing dishes, I feel fantastic once I start and then get it finished. It is just so hard sometimes to even get started. This is where I definitely need to just push myself to get up and do something!

How to you handle the new school year if you have kids in school? Do you find it exciting, or frustrating?

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Success! 2 Down; 2 To Go!

Published May 26, 2016 by Angela

Graduation went fantastic! Kendall has already moved out, a couple of weeks ago, and our relationship has definitely improved.

And as much as I complain about my kids; I am truly Blessed to have been given the responsibility to raise these little girls into beautiful, smart young women!

Is it easy? NEVER.

I honestly look back on some of the things I have went through, and do not know how I made it.

Would I trade it for anything? ehhhh; we will just let that one go for right now.

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I’ve done good; willingly or not…I have been raising some pretty amazing women!

How To Stress Out Your Mom…

Published May 19, 2016 by Angela

Stressed Mom 3

  1. Get a letter in the mail the high school sends in March, letting her know you are in danger of graduating.
  2. Do not let her see that letter, or mention anything about the above situation.
  3. Make her pay $250.00 for your cap, gown, and invitations.
  4. Make her spend $40.00 on stamps, and $80.00 on photos for the invitations.
  5. Make her find addresses and fill all of them out, and get them in the mail.
  6. Continue to NOT tell her there is a chance you are not graduating at all.
  7. Tell her on Monday, at 2 pm, that she has until 3 pm, that day, to pay $161.00 for your band camp bill, or you do not get to receive your diploma.
  8. Again; continue to NOT tell her there is a chance you are not graduating at all.
  9. Let your school counselor call her at work to tell her to get ahold of you and tell you to get to the school, or you are not graduating.
  10. WHAT???
  11. Tell your Mom you are doing your best, but you just do not think you can get it done in time.
  12. Again; do not mention the letter sent to her in March that you opened and disposed of.
  13. Let your Mom call the school counselor 2 hours later, and have the counselor tell Mommy that they sent a letter in March.
  14. Let your Mom find out that you have one more assignment to do, that has to be turned in that day, but you have to work that night.

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I wish I could truly express the amount, and severity, of emotions I was going through for a couple days. But honestly, I would not wish that on my worst enemy. And I have a few.

She passed her class, and she will be graduating with the rest of her class.

And I will be so happy to have the graduation done, the open house finished, and I can go on my merry way, worrying about the 2 girls I still have at home….

UGH

 

I Think She Is Doing It On Purpose…

Published April 29, 2016 by Angela

…being as irritating as possible, in the hopes that I will tell her to move out before she graduates. Before she gets a job. Before she can financially support herself.

I really do not think she understands that once this happens, she will truly be cut off from any financial assistance from me.

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The only thing that I am still obligated to pay for (kind of), is the car insurance that automatically comes out of my paycheck every week. Which is why two weeks ago I took her to our Secretary of State and signed the car title over to her. Which means I am NOT obligated to have insurance on the car I gave her. But she sure is. That also means I can cancel the insurance tomorrow if I choose to do so.

She has her Senior prom tomorrow. She graduates in 4 weeks. I keep telling her to focus on school; not on how fast she can be a grown-ass adult and living on her own.

So the drama continues. I honestly hope that she is still living in this house when she graduates. Because if she isn’t, I am probably not likely to host her open house the weekend after.

Yes; I am a bad Mom.

I do not care.

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I swear to goodness if one more of my children asks me for one tiny thing, my head is going to explode.

I hate seeing I have a message or missed call on my phone. Because I start wondering what one of my kids is asking me for. And 99% of the time, that is exactly what it is.

Yes, I gave birth to them.

No, they did not ask to be born. And when one of them had the nerve to say that to me? My reply was, “It is a good thing you did not ask to be born; because the answer would have been no!”

This sense of entitlement is literally driving me mad, and I am partially responsible for it. Being a single parent with 4 daughters, it was, and still is, hard to fight a specific battle with each specific child every day. Sometimes I gave in. And now I am paying for it.

 

How Bad Should You Make Your Child’s Reality?

Published April 26, 2016 by Angela

I should clarify.

I am talking about my 18 year old daughter who will graduate high school in a month, wants to take a year off before she goes to college, got fired from her job, and is going to move in with her boyfriend of 6 months.

Stressed Mom 1

Now you get the picture.

I have a running bill of over $500.00 that she owes me for her cell phone and monthly cell phone bills. And I made it crystal clear that she is not moving anywhere until she has a full time job, because once she goes, I will not help her.

I will NOT help her. Bad Mom? Whatever. I still have a 14 and 11 year old daughter here that I am raising alone, so if she wants to be a grown up, she can be a grown up.

The way I see it, is if you are not going to college, you have 16 hours a day available to work in order to financially support yourself.

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Ramen noodles? You better get a taste for them. Planet Fitness? Yeah; I ain’t paying that.

It is so tough watching them spread their wings to fly when you can see the crash and burn coming right around the corner.

Parenthood is way over-rated. I was never meant to be a Mom, and should have never been a Mom. But that is a whole different post I will share with you soon enough.

How do you tough-love your kids when they refuse to listen to logic and reason?

So Is It Considered Snooping…

Published March 31, 2016 by Angela

…when you have 2 different daughters who leave their Facebook accounts open; one on IE, and one on Google Chrome? Literally, the computer was completely shut off, and I turn it on, and go to get into my FB account, and voila, they each have their accounts open on a different platform.

Oh; yeah, the answer is “NO”, it is not snooping. I have 2 daughters, one is now 18 and an “adult”, who I am literally counting the days until her graduation, her open house, and packing her up and moving her to Colorado.

Call me a bad Mom, I honestly do not care. My 14 year old has been trouble since she learned what the word was. She is smart, beautiful, and abandoned by her father when she was 4, so any man, and yes I mean Man, that gives her attention; she is all over it.

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So I am going to sit here and make sure my girls are safe. Because no one else will. And, unfortunately, no one else cares.

How Much Is Too Much?

Published March 1, 2016 by Angela

…and when you do it to yourself, should you really be complaining about it?

Yes, I did it to myself, and I am still going to complain about it.

Sorry; it is what I do…

So to avoid doing my homework for my college class. I did this:

 

And then I came home and did my homework.

And checked my 9th graders homeschooling homework.

And set her assignments for tomorrow.

And cooked dinner. And moved some laundry. And checked my blogs. And maybe cried a little…

I could get rid of my college classes, but I want to go further with my company.

I could force my 14 year old to go to public school, but it didn’t work before.

I could give up teaching the youth group at church on Wednesdays, but they depend on me. And I depend on them. To make me laugh, and learn with them.

So what do you give up when it seems like it is too much?