parenting

All posts tagged parenting

If I May Interrupt Your Currently Scheduled Broadcast…

Published November 16, 2017 by Angela

…to discuss something that I have quickly realized is an epidemic in my community. I have been aware of it, heard some talk here-and-there about it, but when it begins to affect my personal life, I feel I must take action.

It is children being raised by their Grandparents. I do not see this as a bad thing, and am grateful for every single grandparent who has taken on the responsibility of raising their grandchildren, because their own children are unable or unwilling to.

It's hurting again drawing

My 13 year old daughter has two best friends, one who lives with her Granny, and another who lives with her Grandma and Grandpa. These girls are always at my house. I feed them, I take them to church, and one of them spends at least 4 nights out of 7 at my house. I am okay with that. I know the grandparents of this one girl, and they are also raising one of her brothers. They send food over, take the girls places, etc. It is a group effort, and I am glad to be a part of it.

So what happened yesterday was my 13 year old shows up with a boy from school. He doesn’t have his house key, and no one is home right now.

Okay, fair enough. I ask him where he lives, and he says he is going to walk home. No problem. I told him he will be leaving by 7:30.

Feeling under the weather all week, congested and with sinus headache, I fell asleep while sitting up in my bed reading a book. I wake up at 11:45 pm. I go in the living room, and there sits said boy, watching television.

“What are you still doing here?!?!?!” (my daughter is sound asleep).

“I don’t know.”

“Who exactly do you live with?”

“My Grandma.”

He gets his coat on, grabs his backpack, and starts heading out the door.

“What are you doing?!?!?!?”

“Walking home.”

Uh, the hell you are, it’s freaking midnight.”

Sad Kid Image

azloraimt.deviantart.com 

Anyhow, to make a long story short; I know; too late: I drop him off at a home with 3 cars in the driveway, lights on, front door is locked, he walks around the back, not to be seen again. Now I don’t know if he got in the house, and this isn’t a great neighborhood. I am not about to knock on the front door, walk around the back, or continue to sit in my vehicle in the middle of the road.

I was so stressed and upset about the well-being of this boy when I got back home that I had to take a Xanax just to calm the hell down and try to get back to sleep. I barely slept, and woke up still worrying.

I cannot imagine what kind of life this 13 year old boy has that he can be gone from his home at midnight, and there is not one single person who cares enough about him to be looking for him, texting him, anything.

It absolutely breaks my heart. What the hell have we become as a society? There are parents who don’t care about their kids any longer, and can’t be bothered to take care of them. We are failing our children. The responsibility falls on the grandparents so very often, and they lack the resources, room, energy, and likely knowledge of this new digital social media world we are in now.

This one incident has pushed me in the direction of seeing what kind of resources are available in my community, and what I can do to help.

Advertisements

This Black Hole of Depression

Published November 13, 2017 by Angela

It has been a week since the time change, and it now gets dark before 5:30 pm. Already I am dealing with the effects of a lack of sun in my life.

Add on top of it, issues with kids, the upcoming holidays that I wish would just bypass me, and health issues, and I am a big ball of mess. I already know as soon as I get home from work, I am heading straight to bed. What’s even worse? I could not care less. I’m curling up under my blankets with my two nekkid kitties and binge watching documentaries.

Benny and Franklin 3

Benjamin (grey cat) & Franklin 

I hope I can shake this craptastic fucking thing that is overwhelming me right now, but until something lets loose for me, it is going to be a long, miserable Winter season. I try to spend as much time at all of my church activities because it definitely helps.

Do you have a sure-fire way to deal with this type of depression? If so, I would love to hear it!

fin

A Little Explanation of my Blog!

Published November 5, 2017 by Angela

I had to laugh when a co-worker who follows my book blog asked why I have a blog titled “Parenthood and Other Horror Stories”.

Really?

I think it speaks for itself 🙂

I think it is about time I focus this blog on my single-mom-of-four-daughters-works-full+ time-helps-everyone-else thing I got going on.

One daughter is out of the nest, and another about to be gone this week. But I have extra kids here due to their personal situations, and am trying to take care of everyone. I know I am not the only one who lives this type of life; but starting tomorrow, I am going to start letting you know what a typical day for me is.

Buckle your seat belts folks, it is gonna be a bumpy ride!

HOLD ON!!!!

Today I Choose to Just Be Grateful!

Published March 16, 2017 by Angela

I did not sleep very well last night, and woke up with a very sore back. But my cat alerted me to the 4 deer in our front yard, and it was a wonderful site to see at such an early hour. I am grateful I was awake for it.

I have been grumbling for 5 days about a flooded basement in my new home. It is time to realize my good fortune, and be grateful that I had the ability as a single parent to buy this house for my family.

I wake up most mornings wishing I could sleep a little longer, and not have to go to work. But I will always be grateful for the wonderful job I have had for over 20 years, that has done so much for me, and provided for my family. Many are struggling to find full time employment that will support themselves and their families.

I’ve been spending months complaining about the 50 lbs of weight I have managed to gain over the last two years; yet I make no conscious effort to change that. I have a rowing machine being delivered tomorrow, and am grateful that I am able to exercise and get myself feeling better, and healthier.

I am grateful to have the choice to choose healthy food for myself and my family, when so many have little to no food at all. My cure all for everything that ails me? Honey with the comb, which fits great in these tiny Ball jars to take to work!

Honey in Comb

I am grateful for so many things every single day; but it is not often enough that I take inventory of those things.

What are you grateful for today?

So About Day Two of This Journey of Mine…

Published March 14, 2017 by Angela

…which was yesterday…. YIKES… good grief I have got to be stronger, more patient, slow down, open my ears, and close my mouth. I am not trying to feel discouraged that day 2 was a total bust, and that I should just go back to Day 1. Lesson(s) learned.

You Know You're Stressed 3-14-17

So my Day 3 is going better, and I am hoping for a quiet, uneventful night at home after I get out of work. This should be fairly simple to accomplish, as I intend on getting dinner on the way home from work, and doing absolutely nothing else besides reading or crosswords.

From my morning reading of “Hands Free Life”, by Rachel Macy Stafford:

“The next time you yearn to fill the spaces of your life and be all there, try using the visual image of physically removing the heavy clock from around your neck. Feel the weight being lifted off your chest as you give yourself permission to be in one place and one place only. Remind yourself these are the spaces where real living occurs and you have every right to devote time and attention to the most important spaces of life” (Stafford, 2015, pg. 42).

I know I have a very difficult time relaxing, especially when I see things around me that need to be done. I feel guilty when I am doing “nothing”, and I need to start seeing my down-time as when I can relax, recharge, and get myself balanced. It is okay to not get everything done at once.

I am sure I will be telling myself this every day for a very, very long time until I master this one task that seems so easy, yet is so very hard for me.

How To Stress Out Your Mom…

Published May 19, 2016 by Angela

Stressed Mom 3

  1. Get a letter in the mail the high school sends in March, letting her know you are in danger of graduating.
  2. Do not let her see that letter, or mention anything about the above situation.
  3. Make her pay $250.00 for your cap, gown, and invitations.
  4. Make her spend $40.00 on stamps, and $80.00 on photos for the invitations.
  5. Make her find addresses and fill all of them out, and get them in the mail.
  6. Continue to NOT tell her there is a chance you are not graduating at all.
  7. Tell her on Monday, at 2 pm, that she has until 3 pm, that day, to pay $161.00 for your band camp bill, or you do not get to receive your diploma.
  8. Again; continue to NOT tell her there is a chance you are not graduating at all.
  9. Let your school counselor call her at work to tell her to get ahold of you and tell you to get to the school, or you are not graduating.
  10. WHAT???
  11. Tell your Mom you are doing your best, but you just do not think you can get it done in time.
  12. Again; do not mention the letter sent to her in March that you opened and disposed of.
  13. Let your Mom call the school counselor 2 hours later, and have the counselor tell Mommy that they sent a letter in March.
  14. Let your Mom find out that you have one more assignment to do, that has to be turned in that day, but you have to work that night.

Stressed Mom 4

I wish I could truly express the amount, and severity, of emotions I was going through for a couple days. But honestly, I would not wish that on my worst enemy. And I have a few.

She passed her class, and she will be graduating with the rest of her class.

And I will be so happy to have the graduation done, the open house finished, and I can go on my merry way, worrying about the 2 girls I still have at home….

UGH

 

It’s Getting Close!

Published May 10, 2016 by Angela

Am I too excited? Probably. Feeling stressed about getting the open house invites out, getting the decorations and centerpieces, and still homeschooling a 9th grader.

DSC_0036

But my soon-to-be graduate is working again, and she is as ready to fly the coop as I am to see her go.

Keep in mind; I have 2 teenagers here sharing a room that are eying the real estate!

Cat Life

The Cats don’t care. Just give them peace-and-quiet!

 

The one thing I know about her more than anything, and the reason we butt heads so much..is I was exactly like her growing up.

Hoping for the best, planning for the worst, and living it all day-by-day.