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Back To Reality – Well, By About 50% So Far!

Published January 2, 2014 by Angela

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What a wonderful, relaxing Christmas break I have had. Normally I do not look forward to time off from work (it does nothing more than mess with my sleep schedule and turn me into “not-so-nice-Mommy-anymore!”)

And being the 1st of January, and technically the 2nd for me being a shift worker, I get to go back to work tonight. I am feeling pretty good about this, and not dreading it like most people do.

 

Why is this only back to reality by 50%? Because I am still 2 children short until this upcoming weekend, and it has been like this since the day after Christmas. I have to be completely honest here, my 2 children that are with their father are the same 2 children who have been fighting with each other, and everyone else, non-stop for the past month. My 15 year old didn’t want to go, so while she has been home and not hanging out with her friends, we have had some bonding time, and complete peace and quiet in our house.

Don’t get me wrong, I do miss my girls. But I am liking the peace and quiet right now more than I am missing them. Yes, I know that makes me a bad Mom and I should be crying over the fact that my girls have been gone for a week now. What you need to understand to put this in perspective, or at least in my point of view, is that I never have peace and quiet here. My children never leave to go with their Dad. The last time before now that he has seen them? April. Spring break when I physically dropped them off and picked them back up. Or he wouldn’t have seen them at that time either.

No, I’m not bashing my ex. It is what it is and honestly, I am glad that I do not have to communicate with him on a regular basis, it makes life a lot easier for me and my girls (they agree on this point, hence, one of them not even wanting to go).

So I think I have 3 or 4 more days of this quiet, argument-free environment before they come back home. And I will hug them, and kiss them, and tell them how much I love them and missed them (Yes, I really do miss them!). And then I am going to try to put into place something; anything that will help everyone get along better without the bickering over completely mute issues.

I am looking forward to making this 2014 year a wonderful one for me and my family, even without resolutions being made.

Have you made any resolutions?

Happy New Year!

Published December 31, 2013 by Angela

 

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What an amazing, challenging, life-changing year I have had. It’s all in the details, but I won’t bore you with that!

 

I wish for you and yours that your wishes come true, problems are solved, questions are answered, and every day is a Blessing that you cherish! May your 2014 exceed all of your hopes and dreams!

Christmas Is Over…..Now What?

Published December 29, 2013 by Angela

After a huge build-up to Christmas, and having a most wonderful Christmas, I would normally be feeling: “Now what do I do?”

I still have a couple days off from work, I am down to one child until after the first of the year, and I am running out of puzzles to assemble.

It is still Advent for those of us who Celebrate the Christmas season. Normally I go from Christmas straight to Easter, not stopping to focus on the very real season of Advent. From my Advent Devotionals booklet, today is the fifth day of Christmas. The fifth of 12 days of Christmas, although these 12 days are a bit different than the song 🙂

“Christmas is indeed a huge deal in our country. But is our world really that much different than the first century? How often is Jesus’ birth overshadowed by Christmas specials about St. Nick, snowmen, or grinches? Can we see the torch-lit manger beyond the bright, holiday lights, the high-gloss advertisements, the preoccupying parties? How often do our own Christmas planning and preparations push Him off to the side?” (The World Became Flesh and Dwelt Among Us, 2013, Lutheran Hour Ministries, pg. 23)

I know I tried to Keep Jesus at the forefront of my Christmas celebrations, and I think I did a good job, but of course could have done better. So I will focus on Advent, as we move into the Easter season, and keep putting the important things 1st.

Do you have a special tradition you do at Christmas to honor our Lord?

Praticing Patience

Published December 27, 2013 by Angela

I think UPS has just given up 😦 The 3-day delivery on my Nook HD+ will be here in 7 days. Not angry, UPS and FedEx employees have jobs I would not ever want to do. Very sorry they are taking so much heat; I have to think that all of the customers out there being nasty have never made a mistake in their lives, EVER.
Personally, my girls could have used some time on Christmas morning with gifts missing from under the tree to focus on the real reason for the season; A gift that could never be wrapped!

With 2 of my girls gone for the next several days, and they also happen to be my two fighters 🙂 I literally feel lost as to what to do with myself. I am not used to this much quiet, so my own home is feeling quite alien to me. I am also still off work for several days yet, so this is my time to get things caught up so I can start 2014 on the right foot. And I am super-excited for what this coming year will have in store for me and mine 🙂

Do you have resolutions in mind that you are going to put in place?

Merry Christmas!

Published December 25, 2013 by Angela

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While there are a couple presents under the tree for me this year, there is one gift that can never be compared, and that is the gift of eternal life, thanks to my Savior, Jesus Christ, who was born today, and later died on a cross for the forgiveness of my sins! This gift can never be replaced, returned, and it never gets old or goes out of style. It is the one gift I will never put up on a shelf, and the one gift that I truly thank God for every, single, day.

 

There is nothing better for me than to see the smiles on the faces of my girls on Christmas morning, and I know without my faith and belief in Jesus, I would not be where I am today. To have my health, a secure job, a vehicle, and a warm place to live every day makes me happier than anything else ever could. To be able to provide for my family on my own and take care of all their needs is a wonderful, irreplaceable feeling.

This Christmas season is when I make my resolutions. To worship more. To Witness more. To help others more. To attend my church home more. To tithe more. To be me more. To reach more.

Wait! What Just Happened?

Published December 23, 2013 by Angela

Apparently my body gave up and decided to revolt against my shift-worker-sleeper schedule. After 4 hours of sleep over 3 days, I went to bed last night at 7 pm and am getting up at 11 am this morning. Although I did wake up a few times, it was only long enough to look at the clock, and I went back to sleep.

Either that was some extra-strength Nyquil I took last night, or my body had had enough!. I do not think I have ever slept that long. I have to say, I am feeling super-fantastic right now, and hope this actually allows me to sleep like a normal person for the next several days. It gets real old, real fast, being up the entire night, alone, and then sleeping during the day while my girls are up. The peace and quiet is nice (no girls arguing at 3am) but I am losing half a day, every day, that I do this.

Even though I am used to my shift-worker hours and do like working the odd shift, I hope I can have a “normal” rest of my Christmas vacation! Oddly enough, I feel like I have just lost 1/2 a day of getting things accomplished!

Now I get to bake cupcakes, and a carrot cake, and make sure everything is ready to go for Christmas Eve tomorrow!

Are you ready for the Christmas holiday that got here way to fast? Or do you still need to shop and wrap?

This Is Probably Wrong On So Many Levels….

Published December 20, 2013 by Angela

But I have literally been off from work for 8 hours, and am thinking I need to find a part-time job for 9 days.

I have never, never, in 21+ years of parenting, had to listen to girls fight as much as I have for the last 2 weeks. Unbelievable. The closer it gets to Christmas; the worse they fight. Yet they ask me: “Mom, can you put some more presents under the tree?”

Really?

I am about to return the ones that are already under the tree.

And go shopping for myself.

Honestly, it has been snowing here since Halloween, and I think this is going to be a long season of cabin fever. I have the best of intentions, and the smallest of patience. And the less patience I have, the more they fight. I don’t want to be home having my sleep schedule messed up. I want to go to work at 10 pm, and crawl into bed at 8 am with my earplugs, and eye mask, and “The Hobbit” blaring loud enough in the DVD to drown out my kids arguing.

I am soooo sick of hearing “stupid”, and “idiot” in my house that I can’t even discuss it. When did I become the Mother and Father to such rude children? They weren’t this rude last year, or last month. But I have become the parent of not only children who suffer from being bullied, but they are also the bullies; to their own sisters.

We will be spending every moment that our church is having service at church, and the rest of the time doing things for others who are less fortunate. Because my girls think they have it pretty bad; I think it’s time for them to see what pretty bad really is. It isn’t having to use the same back-pack two years in a row; it is not having a pair of shoes that lets you go to school in the first place.

 

When Did “No” Stop Meaning No?

Published December 17, 2013 by Angela

I know when.

When I stopped making it mean “No.”

When I said “No” and changed my mind later.

When I was too tired to argue with my kids.

 When I was too tired to listen to my kids argue with each other.

When I got sick of listening to my kids whine because they were told “No.”

 When I felt bad for one of my kids for one of any number of reasons and let them have their way.

When I was mad at myself for something I said or did.

When I was mad at myself for something I didn’t say or do, and should have.

There are just some days when I do not have it in me to deal with the whining, bickering, arguing, and crying. There are days when 3 girls, all 3 years apart, can shut themselves in one bedroom and get along so well that I would never even know they are in the house. Then there are days when I literally cannot walk up the stairs, and into the bathroom, without them beginning to argue. I cannot take a shower without someone putting their hands on someone else. I cannot walk into the kitchen to cook dinner without a yelling match breaking out in the living room.

The closer it gets to Christmas; the worse they are behaving.

The closer it gets to Christmas; the less patience I have for it. I mean this is when they are supposed to be all sunshine and roses, right? On their best behavior for Santa, right? Except only one of them may still believe in Santa, and I honestly will be glad when I know for sure that the ruse is up!

So I do take full responsibility for not making “No” mean “No”. Of course they are going to keep bugging me; it always worked before. At some point I have got to make what I say mean what it is supposed to mean, and that will have to be over Christmas break. At the beginning of January I will begin classes for my MBA, so any semblance I have had of peace and free time will be non-existent.

Attitudes can be adjusted, (including mine!!!) but it will take lots of willpower, patience, and positive reinforcement on my part, and cooperation on my children’s part. It will be an experiment in the making, but I am excited to work on it, and fine-tune it, to be able to enjoy the final results, eventually. I will rely on my Faith, and pray often, with my girls, and hope that my positive attitude will set an example for them to have a positive attitude!

The Wrong Christmas Spirit?

Published December 14, 2013 by Angela

As I am starting to feel some mild stress at the fact that I have visited multiple stores looking for a particular gift, and will be doing the same today (in cold, blowing-snow Michigan weather), I am starting to feel my Christmas Spirit wane. I have to say, I have been feeling particularly wonderful this holiday season, much better than recent years past. And now it is getting to me.

Yes, I do truly understand the reason we celebrate Christmas, and there will be even more emphasis on it this year for my girls. I don’t want them to ever lose sight of the reason we have this holiday. Dessert for Christmas dinner this year? A birthday cake and ice cream for Jesus. I can take them to church three times a week and tell them the story of Christmas over and over, but if it isn’t sinking in, it isn’t sinking in. I think this will help them.

So do I give up looking for this one gift? No. I want to get this gift because this person will enjoy and appreciate it, nothing more, nothing less.

So I feel today is the day I finish all of my Christmas shopping, so I can enjoy the rest of the Christmas season for the reasons I am supposed to, and not be focused on something else.

Do you have a particular thing that stresses you out at Christmas? How do you deal with it?