single parent

All posts tagged single parent

My New Boyfriend Likes It

Published June 14, 2015 by Angela

Remember that perfume you spent days looking for as a Christmas gift?

My new boyfriend likes it.

Remember that new restaurant we were going to try out?

My new boyfriend likes it.

Remember how I got “emotional” and showed my feelings?

My new boyfriend likes it.

Remember how we couldn’t do family things because you already raised your kids?

My new boyfriend likes it.

Remember how I could not get mad at you, otherwise I had anger issues?

My new boyfriend likes it.

Remember how the last time we went through this you said you would never forget how it hurt?

My new boyfriend likes it.

And so do I.

Because I will finally stand up for myself, and my wants, my needs, and more than anything; my kids.

Because I have someone that has decided to love me because of my flaws, and not in spite of my flaws.

And my daughters like that.

There is a Light at the End of the Tunnel!

Published June 2, 2015 by Angela

One assignment is left for Erin’s homeschooling. And that will conclude two years of homeschooling. And I will be speeding to the high school with her to get her registered for her Freshman year in public school.

I really do not know how I managed to get through two years of this. And kudos to those of you who do it for much longer, and for more than one child. Most people who have never attempted to homeschool do not realize how difficult it truly is.

Rewarding? Absolutely. And every single grade is hard-earned. I know Erin and I both learned a lot from this experience, but I would be lying if I said I was not thrilled to be done with it.

And I made it clear to Erin and my 10 year old (Cassidy), that no one will ever homeschool again. I hope I can hold true to that. Obviously if there was an issue with the education they were getting at public school, I would have to reconsider that statement.

I am praying with fingers crossed that it never gets to that point.

If You Could Smack Someone Upside the Head with No Consequences, Who Would You Smack?

Published May 31, 2015 by Angela

See? You had a person in mind, didn’t you? Immediately, there is one person who came to mind. You would love to just box their ears and be able to walk away. They wouldn’t be mad, and you wouldn’t get in trouble.

I, too, have such a person. A person who has went out of their way to try to irritate me, get under my skin, and make me upset. For such a long time that it got old years ago.

Really; who does this to other people? Who does this to other people and gets so much enjoyment from it? What type of person is so low on self-esteem that the only way they can feel good about themselves is to tear other people down?

Yeah; I have that person in my life. I bet you do as well.

Do you wonder what makes them tick? And even more than that, do you wonder what you can do to get back at them?

I do. Every day. Every. Single. Day. I recently told someone that I know God put this person in my life to test me, and make me a better person. But when is He going to make them be a better person?

It gets painful always turning the other cheek. Especially when you get smacked every time you do.

So just take a minute, close your eyes, and imagine smacking that person upside their cinder-block-head, walking away, and no repercussions.

Do you feel better now?

I know I do 🙂

Springfield, Illinois – All THings Lincoln Vacation!

Published May 1, 2015 by Angela

Day one went fairly well, we visited Lincoln’s Tomb (I may have to visit again before I leave!) and we are going to the Presidential Museum and Library today. We had to make sure we all rubbed Abraham’s nose 🙂

The crowds should start arriving today, and other than some minor issues of getting lost (dead phones, sketchy maps) we managed to get around fairly easy yesterday. By Tomorrow, I expect it to be wall-to-wall people, everywhere. Which is why I did not make an itinerary to try to stick to and stress myself out 🙂

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The More Things Change…

Published April 22, 2015 by Angela

…the more they really do stay the same. Such as parenting. In my case; single parenting. I have been a single parent longer than I haven’t, so it really is the only way of life I know.

As each child grows up and sets new goals, and reaches new milestones, it seems there is another coming right behind them and I get the re-runs of what the first (or second, or third!) one did, with the next one doing the same exact things, only with their own style and flair.

My fourth daughter will never, EVER be able to get anything past me. Not only have her 3 older sisters done and said it all, I remember I basically did the same things myself to my parents when I was growing up.

They do grow up, and move out, and get jobs, but they are still every bit as important to me, and I do not worry one bit less about them as they go from being my little girl to being an adult.

I would be lying if I said I was not anxious to have my kids grown and out of the house. And I try not to lie. Does that make me a bad mom? I know some who think that it does. But when your entire life revolves around your children; their wants, their needs, their achievements, and their failures, you do start to forget what it was you were supposed to be doing with your life. When you do it as a single parent (a single parent who has children that do not visit their father for more than 5 days over Christmas each year), you do sometimes feel like you are drowning in what everyone else wants and needs.

What were the goals I had when I was their ages? I honestly do not remember anymore.

When was the last day that I did not have to take someone somewhere, pick someone up, or have extra kids in my house? It has been so long, I don’t remember that either.

I know I need to take time for myself, and it is not like I don’t try to do just that. But by the time I get done taking care of the responsibilities I have as a parent, there is no time left for me.

Do I love my girls? More than anything! Do I regret having children? Not for a second. But that does not make me a bad person or mother because I am anxiously awaiting my empty nest 🙂

I also get told all the time that I will look back on this time and regret wishing my girls would grow up. Honestly, they are spaced 13 years apart from oldest to youngest, so mathematically, by the time the youngest one is out of the house, I will be well beyond ready for my empty nest.

My oldest is graduating from college in 3 days; I love her, and she was honestly the best behaved out of my four girls, but that certainly does not mean I wish she was 6 years old again. Or 12, or 15.

Thanks, but no thanks. That’s what memories are for; and I will have a heart full to think about, in my empty nest, all peaceful and quiet.