raising girls

All posts tagged raising girls

How Much Is Too Much?

Published March 1, 2016 by Angela

…and when you do it to yourself, should you really be complaining about it?

Yes, I did it to myself, and I am still going to complain about it.

Sorry; it is what I do…

So to avoid doing my homework for my college class. I did this:

 

And then I came home and did my homework.

And checked my 9th graders homeschooling homework.

And set her assignments for tomorrow.

And cooked dinner. And moved some laundry. And checked my blogs. And maybe cried a little…

I could get rid of my college classes, but I want to go further with my company.

I could force my 14 year old to go to public school, but it didn’t work before.

I could give up teaching the youth group at church on Wednesdays, but they depend on me. And I depend on them. To make me laugh, and learn with them.

So what do you give up when it seems like it is too much?

Fighting the System…

Published February 6, 2016 by Angela

…or fighting your kids.

At some point, you have to pick a side.

I side with my children.

Did I want her to go to public school for her high school years, and nail it???

You have NO idea.

But here I sit; homeschooling again.

So now the battle is:

What do you want to be when you grow up? Because you CANNOT live with me forever! Let’s focus on what you like, and study that.

It is never ending.

My just-turned-18-year-old looked offended when I told her Friday…”You graduate in 112 days; and move out in 115.”

Yes; I am that parent.

No; I do not apologize for it.

Raising 4 daughters for the last 24 years being nothing more than a single parent…Dr appointments, school conferences, band concerts, middle-of-the-night not making it to the bathroom vomit sessions, PMS that would kill the Pope….

Yep; move it on, and move it out…

I love you, and I support you, but you gotta go…

 

 

Winging It; Homeschool-Style

Published January 5, 2016 by Angela

7th grade consisted of buying $500.00 worth of books, writing my own lesson plan and schedule, with minimum success. 

8th grade consisted of registering at an online academy; again with minimal success.

9th grade has me rethinking this whole situation. Although I know what the basic requirements are for each high school grade in Michigan in order for my daughter to get a diploma, the emphasis will be on the things that interest her. The things she is passionate about, as well as the things that challenge her.

So she is starting French, working through some pre-test SAT books, reading about Joan of Ark, and practicing math skills.

I have no idea what the coming weeks will bring, but I certainly feel much better about this method than the previous ones I have tried.

More to come!

They Just Keep Growing Up!

Published October 10, 2015 by Angela

Had a fantastic night at our last home football game. Which means Senior Recognition Night, and I was able to hang out on the football field with my oldest daughter and my Senior as she was recognized for being the Drum Major in the marching band.

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Bittersweet.

Senior Night BRMB 10-9-2015 003

Yes; me. Bittersweet. Me, that complains about my girls, and how they drive me crazy and need to grow up and move out.

Senior Night BRMB 10-9-2015 029

But I could not ever be more proud of this girl. She has went through, and put up with, so much BS, and she is absolutely beautiful, inside and out.

Oh, and yeah, Muskegon Big Reds did it again…pulled out a win even though the refs were being completely ridiculous. Even the opposing team said the refs were out of line!!!

Thank Goodness for Public Schools!

Published September 10, 2015 by Angela

Yes; I am over-the-moon that my introverted 14 year old, whom I home-schooled for 7th & 8th grades because she refused to go to school; is an active, happy Freshman at our local high school.

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Am I knocking home-schooling? Never. We had fun, and we learned together. But as a single Mom who works 50 hours a week, it was more than difficult.

To have her come home and be excited as she tells me what happened during her day, and to see her waiting outside for me to pick her up, surrounded by friends; tears and happiness.

I am so proud of her for doing this, because I know as much as she tells me about the exciting things; she is stressed about the halls full of kids she doesn’t know, the teachers asking her questions, and trying to find her way around a 3-story school.

She is the one being sat on :-)

She is the one being sat on 🙂

She is determined to belong, while being herself. And that makes me more happy that anything else ever could.

Please Do Not Make Me Pick Up the Pieces, Again!

Published September 5, 2015 by Angela

After a whirlwind summer of the father of 3 of my girls moving back to town, and ending his I-will-see-you-once-a-year-for-Christmas, for 7 years, it looks like he is leaving again. He has had my youngest two every weekend for 2 months. I had to yell at him about disowning our 17-year-old because she could not spend weekends with him. She works, she is the Drum Major of the marching band, and is on the Varsity Volleyball team. It is her Senior year, and she has time for no one.

He had an interview to get hired in where he was working as a temp. While he was there, his girlfriend left him a note and bolted.

Okay, I am sorry, but at some point I would expect his family to stop hating me. Two ex-wives and a girlfriend leave him. It may be time for you to realize that he is indeed the problem.

So I have an 11 year old who is going to lose her mind, and be heartbroken if he is not here next weekend to get her. And I do not think he will be.

And I am about 98% positive that after I pick up the pieces this time, she will be done with him. Just like the other girls. So once again, I get to nurture broken girls, who have no father, and how much longer do I have to do this, really?

Why You Suck As A Father Part II

Published August 14, 2015 by Angela

Yes, I am going to be that Mom-Ex for a minute.

Okay, for a few weeks, more than likely. In case if you missed my first rant of why the dad-who-disappeared is stressing me out, you can read that here: Why an Absentee Father Should Disappear Again

So, you may have read it, or you didn’t. But I will fill you in on some backstory.

I got divorced nearly 9 years ago. For the past 7 years, the ex has picked up our girls for one week a year; at Christmas. He doesn’t pay child support. He doesn’t call them on their birthdays. He does not try to contact them except to let me know he is getting them over Christmas break.

So suddenly, he moves back into town.

And when I say back into town, I mean he is living at a local campground in a tent.

So although my 10 and 14 year old are more than able to go spend weekends with him, my 17-year-old senior in high school is not. Why not? Because she is the Drum Major for the marching band. She is on the Varsity Volleyball team. She has a job. And she is working on scholarship applications already because she knows I am very limited on how I can pay her tuition.

So what does he do? He ignores her.

When I get home from working 10 hours today to have my 14 year old say to me “Dad is picking us up tomorrow before he goes to work. For a surprise. But we don’t know what is going on. He will drop us back off before he goes to work.”

ME: “Is 17-year-old part of this surprise?”

14-year-old: “I don’t think so.”

Who does this? What kind of “father” punishes his daughter for trying to be the best person she can be? If you have not read that post I linked to above yet, you should probably read it now.

I am so beyond upset and stressed because he is back disrupting our lives, but I do know it will not be for long. I told him a long time ago……”When your kids get older, they will not have time for you…just like you do not have time for them now.”